Author's Note: We are working on our district writing assessments and this year we have a very open guideline so we don't have a story to read or many rules to follow. I recently read about Bethany Hamilton, a surfer, and her shark attack which was followed by a truly amazing story. One month after she had been attacked and lost her arm she went back into the water. This was inspirational. She got severely hurt and that changed her life, but that never stopped her from going on. Her story gives great meaning to never giving up.
Never give up; no matter what happens just keep going. Occasionally people give up too early when they could have tried again and accomplished something they thought of as impossible. For example, when you first learned to ride a bike, you tried and tried, and then sometimes you fell, but you didn't stop trying. Then soon enough you rode your bike as if you have been all your life. Now think about everything that you have accomplished in life so far, and think about how many times you had to try and try again until you got it right. No matter what happened you never gave up and that's why you can do what you couldn't before.
Life is tough, but it's worth living for even with some obstacles in your way. If you want to achieve something, you will strive to get it accomplished. Sure, you may make a mistake, but you don't stop; learn from your mistakes and try again. Like everyone says, "Practice makes perfect." and it's true. The ones who practiced never gave up on what they believed they could do. Have you ever thought that it was just you who made mistakes, just you who constantly felt discouraged, or just you who thought you could never do it? Don't worry everybody has those thoughts so you will never be alone.
Last year I learned to downhill ski and it was very difficult at first. Sometimes I had a few of those negative thoughts running through my head. I remember my very first day, I looked up at a hill, a bunny hill, and at that moment I affirmed, "I will never be able to ski down that." I took lessons that day; nearly two hours of walking up and sliding down a slope that must have been four feet tall. My first impression of skiing: tiring, agonizing, and there's no way. Then finally I got to the "massive and terrifying" bunny hill. The towrope brought me right to the top and it took me a while, but I finally got the fortitude to ski down. It must have been only ten seconds and I reached the bottom. I didn't fall! I became filled with excitement and then the next few times I went on ski trips I attempted some of the most extensive and rugged hills that the ski parks had. Of course I constantly made mistakes on my technique or wiped-out all together, but I had such an incredible time I kept on going.
It wasn't until one of the last times I went skiing that winter when I was completely frightened, but not of the hill. I skied down the terrain hill which meant various bumps, turns, jumps, and rails came up along the hill. Every time I went on the hill before I would purposely go past the jumps and rails, but then one time there was a jump hidden from my sight. I became airborne for a few seconds, but that gave me enough time to realize I just went off a jump. Tragically it didn't give me enough time to think to land. I fell and my head hit the ground a tenth of a second before the rest of my body. My helmet came off with the impact of the ground. I lied there on the frigid snow in the middle of a terrain hill. Pain quickly traveled through parts of my body, but I couldn't just stay there so I got up and swiftly finished. My head and neck hurt intensely that night; I could barely move and control my neck. For about five days my neck hurt and was so weak that when I lied down or got up I needed help holding my head so it wouldn't fall back. To make it worse, I was limited to a very insignificant range of movement. During that period of time, I was most terrified of possibly needing a neck brace and not being able to ski for the rest of the season.
Luckily I didn't get hurt quite severely and by a week's time I was good as new. About another week later I was back to skiing, but that time I became much more cautious for what I was doing. I'm glad I never gave up from the beginning. Skiing is one of many things that I repeatedly tried over and over, and I'm still learning. Now skiing is an important part of my life. I love it and look forward to every time on the slopes. Next time you think you can’t switch that around and say, “I can do it. I can go on.” Never give up and you will find something great within what you have accomplished.
I really enjoyed reading this piece. It was very inspirational and you did a good job using your story of skiing to convey your message. I also saw a very good vocabulary words. Nice Job!
ReplyDeleteI agree with Madeline about how you made connections in this piece, elevating it from banality to advanced thinking. You know, you may be under-estimating your talents in the area of language. Please let's meet more often, and talk about what you are doing with writing.
ReplyDeleteI really liked how you were able to connect with the surfing accident. I thought that your connection was really helpful when it comes to understand your piece. I thought your word choice wqas excellent. I also thought that your conclusion was "happy" compared to the tone of your piece.
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